It’s amusing to consider life in function of how close to death we are. It would seem, there is a point at which it becomes more pragmatic to consider life in relation to approaching death as opposed to years lived. Maybe this changes as one approaches the upper echelons of age, but I would not know.
The truth is simple, no matter how incrementally time is broken down it is still finite. Finding pursuits worthy of that ever diminishing time becomes more critical and difficult.
Is wisdom the ability to discern what pursuits are worthwhile? Or is wisdom simply a tool that allows us to make decisions that excuse ourselves from blame or corruption? Or perhaps it is best that we ignore wisdom, for it is an inconvenience that leads to inaction over action.
Again, I do not know.
And that leads me to a new a question I have considered. What is understanding?
Is understanding the total and unequivocal acceptance of another’s position once an argument has been posited? Does it rely on the empathetic relation of someone’s position and their choices? Does understanding really convey a meaning of mutual coordination or is it simply a tool to ally oneself with another’s stance?
Once more, I say I don’t know.
I take the stance of an independent. Act in your own best interest. Whether that be to benefit of others or just yourself, at the very least you can lie at night knowing you’ve propagated the growth of your own goals. There is emotional interplay that affects the choices we make, no denying it. But to what extent?
For myself, I stop at shame. If something appears to cast shame onto me, or I feel shame, then that is not a valid argument. We must accept our own doings, as well as the consequences that stem from them.
It my seem that seems very capitalist or “Ayn Randian” but that is not the case. Acting solely in one’s best interest can not be ideal for the simple reason that human growth depends on the interplay between peoples.
Feeling other emotions is good, healthy, and normal. Feeling a debt to others is customary. Just don’t let it overrule your life. Don’t let it control the decisions you make.
One friend of mine, I respect beyond belief. Simply because he pursues his creativity to an extent that I have seen no other do. He creates with only regard to himself, even if the purpose is only to put ink on paper. He lets the fountain flow unrestrained, and that is the most important aspect of being a creative. No crevice unexplored, no rock unturned. To truly live one must let themselves believe in anything, even if it relies on others letting such emotions or creations exist.
Creation is an act of leaving oneself behind upon this world. That is fantastic in and of itself. To create is to truly bare the soul. To create and not amend or change or adapt or cower is a sign of strength and courage.
I hope to leave my mark.